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Combine irresponsibility, impulsivity, and a need for instant gratification, and it’s not surprising that sociopaths get involved in risky behaviour. They tend to have little concern for the safety of others or for themselves. This means that excessive alcohol consumption, drug abuse, compulsive gambling, unsafe sex, excessive appetite for sex outside of the marital home, and dangerous hobbies (including criminal activities) are common.
Having sex outside of their marriages, phone sex, Friday night drug parties, wanting several women in bed at the same time, complete submersion in sex and drugs. Strutting to loud music at discos and night clubs, just in the hope of being seen and approached by someone new.
When male sociopaths become drenched in their own desires they forget all about their darlings at home, a flimsy affair is much more exciting, or simply the craving for fresh meat as one sociopath said is much more palatable than eating from an out of date menu.
The Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders (DSM-V) notes that sociopaths have an inflated sense of self. They are narcissists to the extreme, with a huge sense of entitlement, Dr. Seth Meyers, an American clinical psychologist with the L.A. County Department of Mental Health, wrote for Psychology Today. They tend to blame others for their own failures.
Sociopaths use deceit and manipulation on a regular basis. Lying for the sake of lying. Lying just to see whether you can trick people. And sometimes telling larger lies to get larger effects. Lying to young girls to trick them into having sex with someone who does not mean it when he says he loves them. Then going home and lying to the wife about what a hard day or night they had. What they actually mean is “what a hard I had on today” whilst out with that young girl.
Some sociopaths even go as far as tricking the wife into going out to work during the day, so as they can bring the fresh meat home for a romp in the marital bed.
The DSM-V entry on antisocial personality disorder indicates that sociopaths lack remorse, guilt or shame, even when caught by the spouse. They never change and if allowed will go through their marriage continuing the fresh meat process time and time again, year after year.
We should perhaps ask what causes sociopathy. “Are they born this way?” is one of the most frequently asked questions. The truth is that we don’t know. Stout (2005) sums up the research well, explaining that as much as 50% percent of the cause of sociopathy can be attributed to heritability, while the remaining percentage is a confusing and not-yet-understood mixture of environmental factors. (Notably, a history of childhood abuse among sociopaths is not always present.) Similarly, Ferguson (2010) conducted a meta-analysis and found that 56% of the variance in Antisocial Personality Disorder, the formal disorder of sociopathy, can be explained by genetic influences.
Ref: Martha Stout, a practising psychologist and an instructor in the psychiatry department at Harvard Medical School.
Ref: Ferguson CJ. Department of Behavioral Sciences, Texas A&M International University.
But it is also believed even if it’s not genetic, a child can observe a father and hear stories about him and adopt the trait. So whatever the route of the disorder it can be attributed to the father “like father, like son”.
Sociopaths often end up in prison and never truly know what it feels like to love and trust. Just imagine what that existence is like, not just for a week or month or summer, but for life. Do they even know what they’re missing? No, but they live in a constant state of hyper-vigilance, viewing the world in a sterile, game-like manner. They have no real attachment to anyone but themselves.
We have whole dynasties of such creatures in SVG. If your boyfriend or husband is a sociopath, there is no known cure, best dump him and start again. Or if he [or his family] is a great provider, zip your mouth up and put up with his shenanigans, just be the occasional prostitute to him [make sure he wears a condom], and be seen as that poor woman by others, because the wife is usually the last to know.
It’s not will it happen again, it’s when will it happen again, because as sure as day follows night it will happen again.